Did You Know There is a Secret Society at the University of Michigan?

Most likely not. Anyways, they’re located at the top-floor of the Michigan Union. Good luck breaking-in.

(Psst. to those of less mental acuity, it is not that always-boarded-up-until-two-weeks-ago fraternity house surrounded by a black iron fence at 611 E. Wiliam St. Regardless, attempt a break in!)

Anyone 3 years younger than me gape at me with drool starting to roll over their bottom lip whenever I mention it. The funny/sad/”who-the-the-fuck-are-these-dicklips” organization’s former appellation Michigamua but rebranded themselves the Order of Angell in the last decade.

The reason for the name-change came from some unsavory rumors about the organizations racist, sexist, homophobic, occultist past and practices, including its frequent use of Native American tropes and rituals. Similarly, all of these similar accusations these days, do not mean much until evidence is actually uncovered. Sorry 2016 Humanities majors, not all all-boy’s clubs were composed of malevolent megalomaniacs whose insatiable thirst for power has done countless, irredeemable harm to those that aren’t straight, white, and male.

Nowadays, their leadership and cabal espouse much more progressive policies yet for some reason, considering they’ve been scouting me for at least three years today, I’m still waiting for my invitation into this lame group of wanna-be Skull ‘N’ Bones.


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